Diary of a trainee drama therapist: The hard part

Nothing in life is easy. It just depends how much effort you are willing to put into the task. As a therapist of any sort, you need to undergo therapy – and therapy is work.

It involves examining your life from multiple angles and addressing what causes you to behave in certain ways. In order to break bad habits, or challenge unconscious behaviours you need to make them conscious and strive to change. So much happens unconsciously in the world, that before I can try to deal with another person’s baggage, I need to understand my own.

This doesn’t mean that once you’ve had therapy you become perfect. On the contrary, by destroying the “negative” qualities you have, you’d become less – those qualities are just as important, albeit not required all the time. There are, however, things that come to light that need to change, and for each person these are uniquely different.

That’s where the work comes in.

It can be extremely difficult to change patterns of behaviour that have become ingrained through habits or experiences. Therapy can change you and the way you behave in the world – but it will never change your core – your heart, your emotions, your passions or your will to continue. Even still, anyone around you might be taken aback by any little change that comes about. What would you do if one day someone you knew so well, changed?

Change isn’t bad, and that’s the first thing that I’ve learnt as a trainee. Change through therapy can be extremely positive. It can mean learning to trust yourself and your intuition again. It can mean owning every element of yourself and being in control of it. It can mean regular conversations with your mind, in order to refocus, regroup and continue.

It also means constantly questioning and challenging yourself to be a better human being.

I may never be perfect, but I’ll always strive to be better.
For myself and for my clients.

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